Thursday, December 14, 2006

Socially correct Seasons Greeting - to you all

From me "the wishor" to you "the wishee," please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally responsible, socially conscious, energy efficient, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of a winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions, I wish you a financially successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but with due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures or sects, and having regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting this greeting you are bound by these terms:
This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal. This greeting is freely transferable provided that no alteration shall be made to the original greeting and that the proprietary rights of the wishor are acknowledged. This greeting implies no promise by the wishor to actually implement any of the wishes. This greeting may not be enforceable in certain jurisdictions and/or the restrictions herein may not be binding upon certain wishees in certain jurisdictions and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wishor. This greeting is warranted to perform as reasonably may be expected within the usual application of good tidings, for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first.
The wishor warrants this greeting only for the limited replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wishor. Any references in this greeting to "The Lord", "Father Christmas", "Our Savior", "Rudolph the red nosed reindeer" or any other festive figures, whether actual or fictitious, dead or alive, shall not imply any endorsement by or from them in respect of this greeting, and all proprietary rights in any referenced third party names and images are hereby acknowledged.This greeting is made under United States Law.
Author Unknown, Washington Post 2005

2 comments:

Jeni said...

An a very politically correct wish for a perfectly delightful time designated to celebrate any deity or entity of your choice in, around, on, or during the period of time from twelve days prior to the date many observe as a special day to twelve days thereafter said particular special date. And may you have an especially happy, preferably prosperous 365 days following said special date as well!

Just wondering Vic, after reading your piece, are you planning to go into politics? With the wording of your message, sure could make a good person to do the "double-talk" so often used, especially here in the States by members of all political parties. None are excluded in their ability to do that!

Gene Bach said...

BWWWAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

Now that's funny, I don't care who you are!