Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Having to be social again

I am having to be social again this evening as we are going to a pot luck supper. I am taking smoked trout. I figure no one else will have it and it won't go bad sitting around. It's nice casual so I tidied up a bit and am waiting now for hubby to get home, get showered so we can go.

I spend so much time alone, and the more I am alone, the more alone I want to be. I get up about 6:15am and my husband about 7am, we spend time just talking and drinking coffee until he has to leave at 8:30 am. He gets back about 5pm and we sit down together for a while and then have supper and watch the news, though why we do I don't know, it only gets him upset, and the weather forecast is rarely correct. After we have supper cleaned up I usually get on the computer and he reads until bedtime. Sometimes I share something I have found on the internet that would appeal to him but mostly we just do our own thing, and go to bed around 11:30pm.

I don't have to be alone, there are people I could visit, and things to do, especially in winter, like carpet bowling, darts, red hat club, curling, etc., but I find I can't be bothered. I enjoy being by myself, pottering around the garden, walking, messing around in the kitchen, reading. I rarely get bored. Sometimes, though I feel a little guilty that I don't get out and interact with village people more, but I usually supress that and find something I'd rather do. I groan when any one pops by, I wish I had a butler to say that "Madam, isn't home today", but I am gracious when I answer the door, but I have been known to check who it is first and pretend I am not at home. Have you ever done that?

So I will have to fix on my attentive face, make sure I listen to what is being said, and not venture down my own avenue of thoughts, and generally be sociable. One would think I am shy and retiring wouldn't you, but I am not. If I have something to say, I usually say it. My husband says I tend to be a little blunt, but he likes it as he says he doesn't have to play guessing games with me. If it wasn't for my husband needing a little bit of a social life I probably wouldn't bother to go this evening, especially as we have to drive for an hour and half to get there, but it would be mean of me to not make the extra effort for him. He does so much for me that I get out of my comfort zone for his sake.

Do you like social occasions, or would you rather stay at home?


RUTH said...

I spend so much time alone now that I worry I wouldn't know how to react at a social occassion. Often I can go 2 or 3 days without speaking to or seeing a soul...very difficult when you're used to having someone to talk to. I probably could join some sort of group but I'm quite shy and often these can be quite cliquey
Hope you do have a good time :o)

david mcmahon said...

Hi Vic,

I'll be your butler. I'll wear a tux and a bowler hat and I'll open the door and ceck the name of the visitor.

If it's someone you want to see, I'd let thm in, but if not, I'd say ``Terribly sorry, but her ladyship is frightfully busy in the back garden.''

How does that sound!

Anna said...

I like being home, too. Sometimes it just seems like more effort than it's worth to get out of my comfort zone and go out and interact with people. However, I do like interacting online - from the comfort of my couch!

I tagged you for the middle name meme.

Jeni said...

I used to be VERY social -it even played a big part in why I actually liked (a lot of the time) waitressing as well as selling Avon too. But over the past decade or more, I have gradually become much more of a homebody. Once in a while, it might bite me again and I get restless after being here day in and day out with just the two little ones to tend to and talk to -mostly telling Maya to get out of this or that or to get back in the living room -out of trouble, harms way, etc. About the only thing I really get psyched about on the social stuff these days is a pot luck dinner at church. Love them! And, they do tend to bring me out of my self-imposed shell most of the time. Some time I'll have to blog about the only person I have ever really "hidden" from when that party appeared at my doorstep. Remind me, OK?

Eileen C. Tallon said...

I am going on 75 years of age..I have learnt to enjoy my own company. I enjoy other people..but can go for days, without speaking to, or seeing anyone.

Very interesting, and an amazing blog.

Thank you sincerely for sharing your beautiful blog.

Hugs Eileen from Ontario

jmb said...

I think that you are content to be alone so much because you are not really alone. You live with someone who does his own thing quite happily and you interact as you need to. Sounds like my life except I like a bit more social life than my husband. So I do lunch with my friends now and then and interact with them at other times so it all seems to work out.
If like Ruth, you have put your whole energy into another person for so long, it must be really difficult to be alone afterwards.

"his-self" said...


Man...and woman is by nature a social animal. It takes a very well adjusted person to be satisfied with their own company.

I'm not sure how "well adjusted" I am...maybe more "well worn" but I also enjoy being alone a lot of the time. Sometimes I think it's just the laziness of not wanting to do the work of putting up with others?

Keli said...

Lately I've been home alone as my kids are teens and spreading their wings. It's a big change for me, and so far, I don't mind a bit. I'm catching up on all the things I've been wanting to do. Also, when we do go out and socialize, I appreciate more since it's not a constant grind.